causing a scene in luxembourg

Photos by Sanazle

Just how obnoxious is this extraordinarily large red (velvet) bow atop my head? Well, when you multiply your answer times 73, you can begin to understand the french population's disdain. Whateva, I just really enjoy roaming around Paris in a huge red bow and a paint-splattered Mickey Mouse t-shirt. Speaking of the t-shirt, I received this from my best friend's mother last summer and I became obsessed with it. I mean I still am, I wear it under all of my clothes. Anyway, when I was packing to move to France, my new yet old beloved t-shirt was nowhere to be found. I freaked out and frantically tore apart my house, only to be forced to leave without it. Convinced my older brother stole it (he likes Disney way too much), I wept like a baby daddy finding out he's a baby daddy. Until I went home for break and pulled down my bathrobe from a shelf in the closet. There, hidden in the bathrobe, gleaming like treasure, was this faded Mickey Mouse shirt. I then wept like a baby daddy finding out the baby isn't his. Needless to say, this isn't the last time you'll be seeing this shirt.

That awkward moment when you carry an extremely heavy metal chair across the beautiful Luxembourg gardens and have a really tough time carrying it because your hands and legs are numb from the cold.

That other awkward moment when you start having a dance party while singing show tunes in the quiet and calm Luxembourg gardens.

obligatory valentine's day post

I took the liberty of compiling a Valentine's Day playlist to cover all of your emotions, assuming you'll fall under one of these 4 categories. How to get through Valentine's Day:

1. If you're in love or whatever. Boring. This song is beautiful, "So, this old world must still be spinning round and I still love you."

2. If you're feeling like me, maybe need a little encouragement. This song is unbelievably beautiful as are the performers, though the camera is a little blurry with tears. "Who made the rule that 2 is better than one, I bet that fool is alone by a phone, coming undone."

3. If you want to just forget about it, you want me to stop talking about it, and you want to dance your little heart out OR you're still in mourning for beloved Whitney Houston. I highly recommend this new jam from Sir Gavin Creel. I know you can dig it. "Oh, I wanna dance with somebody, anybody get me out of this town."

4. If you're crying and you need a mix of classical music and Cee Lo Green, then this is for you. "And I'm like f&@cK U (Valentine's Day)."

When I asked Paris to be my valentine, I was actually asking these beauties above. I've already assumed they'll say yes.      2 more days.

What do you say? 2 more days.

l'art du louvre

la ville

beaucoup d'histoire.. peut-être trop.

did you know i love berlin?

Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe

This is not just a monument, it is art.

Goodbye America, Guten Tag Berlin!

That awkward moment when you ask a nice looking, random girl to take a picture for you and the random girl goes to UC Irvine, then she cuts the top of Brandenburg Gate off in said picture. Thank you, nice looking, not so random girl who should never become a photographer.

If you were indeed wondering what the top of the gate looked like, there's a large bird on top of Lady Victory's staff.

What's Germany's national sport? Invading Poland.

Does this hotel look familiar? It shouldn't. Unless you recall THIS happening, which you should.

Onto some style, Berlin style:

Kylie trending skirt over pants, did I talk her into that? As Mr. Big would say, "Abso_@^#%_lutely."

Layering scarves. 2 out of the 12 layers I wore that day.

I don't feel like dancing, no sir, no dancing today.

I know you wanted a close up: 2 of Kylie's scarves, leather jacket, Kylie's chambray shirt, Cody's mom's gold sweater and collared shirt, a black long sleeved shirt, jeans, tights under jeans, red socks, small socks to keep my toes warm, and boots.

Why are we models?

The wall. When they said it fell in 1989, they were lying. It's still there; the only difference is now you don't get shot in the face trying to get into West Berlin.

Have I mentioned I went to Berlin? Have I mentioned I loved it? Oh yeah, just here and here, too and to everyone I've ever talked to after going to Berlin and now in this post. Do you all understand now? Yeah, I don't either. I guess I just have an unexplainable attraction to the TV tower.

In other news, I have successfully enabled Kylie and Sanaz to get addicted to layering, as you can see in this post. I promise the extremely cold weather had nothing to do with it. Layering is a serious addiction and an expensive habit. Okay, not really. It's pretty easy to do on a budget:

Step 1- Put all of the clothes you own on your body one layer at a time.
Step 2- Ignore the snide remarks and curious expressions.
Step 3- Create a blog and pretend you know something about the art of layering.

how berlin won my heart

Check out what I found in Berlin. David Rio Tiger Spice. I freaked out and then literally ached for the luscious taste of this delicious tea. Luckily, they served chai tea lattes, so I bought 3 and made Sanaz and Kylie watch me while I drank them. Just kidding, of course I introduced them to the silky smooth spice of the tiger. Anyway, the point of this post is to prepare you for tomorrow's post. I cannot currently summon the small amount of energy needed to formulate a legit blog post, therefore I figured this would be better than nothing. I apologize for the last lame post and this lame post, but I said Monday and I damn well meant Monday. So, I'll see you tomorrow.

by the sea

This is where I am for the weekend- the French Rivera. A little stretch of land in France between Monaco and Italy. As in Monaco and Italy are walking distance from me at this moment. Low and behold, I'm writing to say that I will not be writing for the weekend. I'm sorry. I'll be back Monday with more beautiful pictures and hopefully some Mediterranean sartorial adventures. Don't forget to smile and radiate love while I'm gone. Remember, life is surreal.

versailles and a history lesson

Obviously pretending to be Mary-Kate and Ashley (avec Hannah). About the outfit- literally the same as this. Sorry about it, there is only so much you can do while dressing yourself out of backpack for 10 days. Oh, and I had to wear the gold sweater to match superfluous shit like this:

Really? It's fine, the people of France didn't need to eat in 1789.

Above photos stolen from Sanaz

The grave of Molière. Wait, why would Molière be buried in the middle of a street outside the Palace of Versailles? It's just an electricity box painted as a headstone. That makes sense.

Toys for the children, larger than the servants quarters.

Beautiful. . .

. . . and fresh.

We went exploring, got lost, and came upon this. I still have no idea what it is, but it's in Versailles. We kept wandering and found a tourist free hidden gem:

Marie Antoinette's theater

Well, we trekked it out to Versailles in the rain to experience the grandeur of the French. If you didn't know, Versailles was the work of King Louis XIV, yet the people pretty much dug the guy (he reigned for 7 decades) and didn't care about the crazy monarchy spending until poor King Louis XVI, who was only king for 17 years before shit got real. If I hadn't fully comprehended why the French were just a little bit peeved, after having seen Versailles, I sure as hell do now. The entire compound is unreal beautiful, but still it made me sick. I couldn't walk through the palace without thinking about how much bread grain the unnecessary silk damask walls would be worth. It makes me wonder- though I've been conditioned to not think twice about the environment around me, what would an exploited sweatshop worker think if they walked through my house? History's parallels are much more prevalent than we'd like to believe. Stay aware y'all.

une journée à paris

What is that ugly thing plaguing our photo? It disgusts me. Hannah is fake smiling, hoping it will go away.

C'est comme ci, comme ça (It's like this, like that).

Okay, fine. We were actually a little bit happy (avec Sanazle, moi, et Hannah).

A red door and a new friend. We found Kylie!

Close up. I'm wearing: Hannah's new cape, the stolen white H&M dress, another one of KJB's mom's blouses, Hannah's tights, and my trusty boots. Thank you, Hannah.

Kylie Monet et son père- wearing scarves!

A big moment for Kylie's dad- his first scarf! And it looks so darn classy.

Matching father-daughter smiles and scarves. (Is it just me or should Kylie invest in a toothbrush?)

Each photo taken by the person who was not in the picture

This post has great advice on how to make an outfit transition from day to night: Change nothing but your game face. Why do you need all those subtle changes? You know- flats to heels, purse to clutch, normal to slutty. Just prepare yourself mentally to get shwasted have a glass of wine with dinner. Take a page out of our book and have a gay ol' time, like The Flintstones. Please, Wilma and Betty wore the same thing everyday; Fred and Barney never complained. Transitioning from day to night isn't as big of a deal as they make it out to be, unless you're headed to the senior prom. In which case, transition away. Basically, what I'm trying to say here is that we look good day and night. 

Onto more important things- like Kylie Monet's dad and his first scarf. Doesn't it look good? A man in a scarf is a man not to be reckoned with. Scarfs can take a man from plain and "man-like" to a man with style, class, and a warm ass neck. I learned the power of the scarf at an early age from my father, who has been rockin' a toasty collar bone since the '90s. Dads everywhere get trendy and get behind the manarf®.

Oh, I just realized I forgot to mention Paris. I really loved it, except for that weird, giant letter "A" that was everywhere (please refer to the first picture).

one picture of paris

One time, I went to Paris. It was awesome. Not as awesome as that one time Regina George punched me in the face. This is me blogging for the sake of that silly promise I made awhile ago. Well, considering it is the 7th of November and I have already surpassed last month's tally, I deserve a one picture post. And let's be real- this is an alright looking picture. À demain!

Une fois, je suis allée à Paris. C'était super. Mais, pas comme super que quand Regina George m'a poinçonné dans la visage. À demain!

story time: berlin

This is photo documentation of our first day in Berlin, Germany. We left the hostel at 10:15 in the morning and got home at 2:30 in the morning. Productive day, indeed.

Preparing for the tour, Sanaz turbanizing, Noe Connaît style.

Meet our tour guide: Seb. Little did we know, Seb would take us on a tour we would never forget.

Brandenburg Gate and the fashion turban getting acquainted. Lady Victory nodding in approval.

There's Kylie and I. Kylie is an innocent bystander and I look an experienced bank robber.

Just in case you wanted a close up. Like I always say, 2 collars are better than 1.

Kylie was just a little cold. She wasn't wearing purple, under green, under black, under pink, under leather, and a beanie fit for making people afraid of her.

Onto part 2 of the tour:

The Pub. You can pour your own beer. Sorry daddy, I guess I've reached my twenties.

The foam was on purpose.

A little the beer and the turban comes off and we don't know where we are.

Part 3 or "The Vice Tour" as Seb called it. Invited to play poker at a dive bar? Why the hell not? (I apologize in advance for the quality of these photos- it is a little difficult to pretend you're not a ridiculous, picture obsessed tourist while using flash photography in an all-locals bar)

Little did we know, this was a serious poker tournament. Above is the big boys table and who is in the corner? 

ME.

For real though. I straight robbed the 3 men in this photograph and ended up in 4th place out of 14, essentially winning back my buy-in and making a profit of 8.50 euros.

Oh, Berlin. You were good to me. The basic moral of the story is to inform you that if there is a free tour in a German city- go on it, go out for drinks with your tour guide, get invited to play underground poker, don't get arrested, and then win. Just don't take the ginger shot.